Customers are Germ Factories!

1. How many of you take your money out of your wallet and THEN lick your finger and count it? Then you hand your spit covered money to me to put in my drawer and while I use hand sanitizer all day long I do not disinfect those bills that you have just polluted. And we all know there are worse things than spit on them.

2. Never buy Carmex in one of those little tubs by the register. They are not safety sealed and I watch people all day long, pick up a tub and open it and put it to their nose and sniff it! Then you come behind them and put it on your lips.

3. All that candy by the register is covered with sneeze germs and little kids slobbery hands.

4. I actually had a woman put a kid with a pissy bottom on the counter the other day. I closed my register to disinfect it but I guarantee you that other cashiers are not so concientious.

Here is a list of my other 6 picks for America's Got Talent.

I originally listed them in my reviews section way back when

1. Landau Eugene Murphy (My hometown boy)

2. Kinetic King

3. Anna Graceman

4.

5. Professor Splash (I have wanted to see somebody do that since I was a kid! The only way it could get any better is if he would dive into a glass of water - haha)

6. Steven Retchless

My Picks Are Screwed for Next Weeks Semi Final on America's Got Talent.

When the season started I picked my top 9 favorite acts to make it to the finals.

7 of them made it to the semi finals.

Only one of them (Lys Agnes) was in last nights show.

That means that 6 of my picks are left to perform in next weeks edition of the semi final round.

They will only pick 5 acts out of the 12 performing.

The law of averages says that I won't get all five which would mean that I just missed one of my picks.

I guess I'll keep my fingers crossed.

When a Tree Falls

One time my husband, at the time, was cutting the top out of a tree behind his mother's house. His sister, Jeannie, and I were holding the guide ropes to make sure the tree fell in the direction he wanted it to fall. Jeannie and I were just standing there nonchalantly holding the ropes talking with each other when we heard a tremendous crack and a rip and the top of the tree started to fall.

We both looked up and I thought, "it's going to fall on us!"

Then I thought, "no, it's not."

Then in a major panic I realized that the tree was coming straight for us. The only thing I had time to do was dive behind a nearby tree to shield myself.

It worked. The tree crashed to the ground all around me - on both sides of the tree that I was hiding behind there were nothing but large, green, leafy branches. But I was safe.

However, I looked over just in time to see a large branch actually bounce just above Jeannie's head just like a yoyo. I could swear that it actually touched her face before it popped back up in the air and settled in it's final resting place. She had frozen in place! She was standing there, with her mouth wide open, looking in the air at the branch just inches above her head! She had not moved an inch. It was only by the grace of God that she was still alive because there is no reason that the very large branch should not have cracked her skull!

I Never Had Lice in My Life Until...

I went through my entire childhood without lice. I was one of the few who made it through beauty school with no lice. This was unusual because when a customer would come in with it they wouldn't even finish the haircut. They would send them home with a recommendation about how to take care of it and then they would shut down all 4 stations (which were connected in a square) and make everybody disinfect everything around them. Usually the students who had the patrons with lice would end up with it anyway and so would the people at the surrounding stations.

I never got it once.

I did hundreds of haircuts over the years for the guys at the track and I never got it either. Then I started to do haircuts during my lunch at Fruth. One day I was cutting, she who shall remain nameless' hair, when I saw a nit. She is very clean but she had picked them up anyway. Then, dummy me, was nice enough to check her children for her. They both had full scale infestations. She bought the medicine to treat herself and her kids and begged me not to tell anyone so I didn't because she had taked care of the problem.

Two Weeks Later I Had Lice in my very long, very thick, blonde hair. I treated it at least 4 times before I was finally satisfied that I had no critters. The bad part was that I had to tell everyone in the store that I had them so that they could check themselves. It was one thing for one person in the store to have them but quite another for 2 to have them.

I also kept my mouth shut about where I got them, even though I explained that I wasn't the only one in the store to have them. EVERYBODY BLAMED ME! It didn't matter that I had discoved the problem on someone else and innocently had them transferred to myself. I was the one they knew who had them. I could have kept my mouth shut and hoped for the best but that is not my way. I wanted to make sure that everyone in the store didn't end up with the little critters!

DO YOU THINK THE PERSON WHO GAVE THEM TO ME STEPPED FORWARD SO I DIDN'T HAVE TO TAKE ALL THE HEAT????

HELL NO!

For the umpteenth time in my life I had to take the heat for someone else's actions.

Here's What Happens When the ATM Spits Out the Wrong Amount of Money

(at least at my bank)

I went to the ATM yesterday and I only wanted $10. When the ATM kicked into gear nothing came out and it went through the cycle 3 times before it gave me $5. The receipt also showed my balance at -$10 instead of -$5.

So I tried to call the bank but they were closed. The lobby was already closed. Then I remembered that the drive thru was open so I went to the window. She looked up my account and assured me that the balance was correct - it was showing -$5 by this time. I guess it needed a few minutes to correct itself.

So, all was well.

Super Pam Strikes Again!

As some of you know I am a one woman Superhero. I dare to step in where others fear to tread in my battles to save the underdog or some such silly cause as I deem worthy. I nearly got myself killed yesterday when I stepped into the heat of battle but I probably saved a young girls life.

I had just spent all of my energy taking out the trash and staggering to a picnic table to rest when the kids in the parking lot of the school next door started to argue. At first I ignored the hullaballoo thinking it was the usual playground fare. Then one of my neighbors joined me and pointed out the rhetoric was getting more heated than usual and she delightedly settled in to watch.

I looked over and I was shocked to see two teenage girls (one holding a toddler) not only arguing but the blonde girl was actually pushing the black girl (who was holding the baby). They were surrounded by the usual schoolyard crowd of screaming kids and I started to hope that the black girl would at least hand the baby off to someone else since the blonde girl obviouly had no respect for the fact that she was holding another human being.

At the same time this was going on, my neighbor was cackling with delight. I was quite shocked by her behavior since she is probably the most amiable person in the building. Since she didn't seem to think someone should intervene I sat back and prayed for the best because I was still too tired to go anywhere else and I had forgotten my cell phone on the charger in my apartment.

Then I looked over to see this gargantuan boy who was at least 250 pounds and over 6 foot tall start to argue with the black girl. She had at least handed off the baby to someone else and the blonde girl was off to the side. All of a sudden he ripped off his backpack and picked the black girl up over his head and bodyslammed her on the pavement and then dropped down on her in a classic pro wrestler move! This kid was so big that he is the kind of guy that football coaches salivate over and he should never be allowed to perform that kind of move on a full grown man - much less a teenage girl. Then he got up and it was obvious that he was going to continue his attack as all the other screaming kids cheered him on.

I jumped up yelling for him to stop but no one could hear me. My stupid neighbor ran across the parking lot to basically revel in the melee and do nothing to help. I had no choice but to get up and walk over to the fence that separated us and yell again, "I have called the police! They are on their way! "

This got their attention. I looked the big, ole boy right in the eye and told him if he was still here when the police got here that I would be testifying against him. Then I almost went into one of my cussing tirades when I saw the murder in his eye had been redirected toward me! He actually took about 4 steps toward me when I righteously turned heel and stomped back to the picnic table. I made it look as if I were thoroughly disgusted with him but in truth my heart was on overload and I was having trouble breathing and I didn't want him to see my weakness because intimidation was the key to my success in stopping the fight.

They disbanded. I sat there resting and trying to breathe. My stupid neighbor went inside and I am quite sure she never called the police as I asked her to because she didn't want to get involved.