We Didn't Have Time for the Nice Policeman

I was driving through the local Walmart parking lot when I happened to see my best friend, Gail, broken down. This was highly unusual because she had the reliable vehicle and I had the klunker that I had to put in the shop once a week like clockwork.

The look of relief on her face was profound when she saw me. She had called a towtruck but she was in a quandary about how to get home and she wanted to accompany the towtruck to the dealer so she could explain what was wrong with the car. I was grateful for the chance to help a friend who had pulled me out of jams more times than I could count.

She jumped in my junker Volvo, which would usually be beneath her standards to ride in, and we took off to the dealership. This Volvo smoked like a freight train. Not even a semi-truck could follow me close if I didn't want them to. All I had to do was mash the gas and a stream of thick, black, greasy, diesel smoke would pour from the car and hang in the air for 1/2 a mile behind me. Unfortunately one of the local policemen in one of the local speedtraps spied my car and pulled me over.

The first thing Gail did was to reach over and try to put on her seatbelt. I told her not to do it because he would be more mad about the deception than he would be about us not wearing them to begin with. We argued back and forth about it as he walked to the window. When he asked me for my ID and such we clammed up and I complied with his requests. He lectured me about the car smoking and I assured him that I had in the shop about once a week to try to fix it (which was no lie) and Gail chimed in that indeed I did have it in the shop all the time. He informed me that if he saw me on the road again he would tow me in and permanently lock up my car.

I thanked him for letting me go and just as he started to walk away he said, "By the way ladies I saw her putting her seatbelt on when I pulled you over. You are lucky I don't write you a ticket for that too."

"I TOLD YOU NOT TO DO THAT, " I yelled at Gail. "See the mess you got us into." She started to yell back and we continued to argue about the seatbelt. I had no idea the officer had stepped away from the car until I saw him pull out and we were still argueing. I could see a smile on his face and I am quite sure he was laughing at us as we argued about our situation.

Gail and I looked at each other and started to laugh. We had just averted another ticket. We took off for the dealership, car smoking the whole way, and laughing about our brush with the law the whole way.