Saturday, February 11, 2012

I Eloped (in 1982)

I always planned on eloping. My parents did it and I thought it was cool. When Bobby and I decided to get married we were going to do it on Thursday, but I was sick on Monday that week, so I had to work Thursday. We got married on Friday. We woke up that morning and we drove to 7 different preachers houses before we found one who was home or had the time to marry us.

Once we found a minister who agreed to marry us, he was busy. He told us to come back around 4:30 he would be happy to perform the ceremony. So we went back home and partied all day. (No sense having the reception after the wedding!) We went back to the church at 4:30. It was a little country church in Jeffrey, WV. right down the road from his sister's house. (she was one of our witnesses). I was surprised by how pretty it was inside. It was decorated in baby blue and white. The preacher counseled us for about 1/2 an hour. Asking many questions before he was satisfied that we were indeed ready to get married. He wouldn't let us pay him, he said that was his wedding present to us.

After the ceremony I stopped by a store and bought a mother-in-law's day card. We took it over to my parents house. (I had been kicked out of the house for going on a weekend trip with Bobby without benefit of marriage first) We walked in the house and as soon as my mom saw us a look of stone came over her face. I ran up the stairs and handed her the mother-in-law's day card and she looked at the card and said in complete bewilderment "Mother-in-law's Day? When is Mother-in-law's Day?" "It's today," I replied, "today is the day we got married." She immediately started gushing and all was right with the world again.

My dad wasn't home when I told my mom we had been married. The next day I was awakened by a phone call and the voice said "Why didn't you invite me to your damn wedding?" I explained to him that I had always wanted to elope because that's what they had done and also I didn't think that he would want to come anyway since I had been kicked out of the house anyway. (he didn't kick me out of the house - that time anyway - she did.

The funny thing was that the same day Bobby and I eloped, my Aunt Mary and Doug eloped and my cousin, Lil' Man and Tonya eloped. None of us knew the other was eloping either. Must have been something in the air that day.

Anyway happily ever after lasted 15 years. We were best friends and had everything that we could want until he fried his brain with drugs. That was after 13 years. I spent 2 years living apart and drug testing him. He passed all of them except for the first one. Finally I told him that if he was going to be clean, then he could do it with no testing. Within 3 months he was as bad as ever.

So, My divorce was final on my 34th. birthday.

I contacted him after being divorced for 10 years and he is still on drugs. Leaving him was the right decision. We had a wonderful marriage which is why I'm so particular. I lived on a pedestal for 13 years and I don't want to get off it now.

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