1. Go ahead, rub it in, WE KNOW, "It's a beautiful day out there."
2. Don't bird dog the cigarettes - just ask for them!
3. I can think of better lies to tell you than "we are out of "your brand" of cigarettes."
4. I am sick of hearing, "I just made it this morning." when I check a bill to see if it's counterfeit.
5. I am sick of hearing, "It's good. It came from the bank," also. (they do not check them before they give them to you!)
6. If it takes you 5 minutes to dig out your money - GET ANOTHER SYSTEM!
7. If your purchase ends in ".00" please do not say, "Well that never happens." It happens all day long actually.
8. After you spend 5 minutes digging out the change to the penny and letting the line build up behind you - don't expect me to smile proudly back at you!
9. I won't be smiling at you while your child throws a screaming candy fit for half an hour and then you give in. If you are going to give in anyway, (99% do) give in immediately so we don't have to listen to it.
10. GET OFF THE @#!*ING CELL PHONE!!! Really, if you can't count money or sign your name what makes you think you can drive a car!
11. DON'T CUSS ME OUT WHEN I "ID" YOU. YOU MAY NOT LIKE THE RESPONSE YOU GET IN RETURN.
12. If your cell phone rings when it is time for you to pay, please pay and THEN answer the phone. I have yet to hear a NECESSARY conversation while we all wait for you to get off the phone.
13. If it costs too much, put something back.
14. FREE HELL! If anything is going to be free then "I" got dibs on it.
15. If the alarm is going off then the store is closed. If you weren't in the store AFTER closing you wouldn't hear it.
16, I am not locking you in when we close. I'm locking people out.
17, Give the old people a little extra time...that will be you someday.
Dedicated to Bob. My list isn't as funny as the one we made. Guess I don't have his touch.
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