Today I went to Logan and spruced up my dad's grave a bit. I am really happy because I was able to do it and although I am worn out and sore, it is the kind of tired that a normal person gets when they have used muscles they haven't used in awhile. I am not upstairs, lying in misery, trying to suck down every drop of oxygen I can get my hands on, knowing that I am going to have to rebuild my body from scratch again. This is good.
I remember going to his grave with my Granny 4 years ago and I couldn't even walk up the hill to his grave - much less help an 80 year old woman get to it. It is like walking up a couple of flights of steep stairs to get to it. Nothing overwhelming for an average person but completely devastating for someone with a disability.
For the past 2 years I have gone to his grave and planted some flowers. (tulips and carpet flowers). I can tell they have bloomed but I haven't visited at the right time of year to see the actual flowers yet. This year I planted a miniature yellow rose bush. I also took an angel statue up there that my dad and I bought for my Granny. She is in a nursing home now and they are selling her house. I stopped by her house and when I saw the statue I decided to take it and put it beside Daddy's grave. I think both he and she will like that.
Beside of my dad's grave is an unmarked grave of an aunt. I placed the angel so she looks over both of them. It's been a good day.