Saturday, July 30, 2011

It must have been a happy birthday!

I must have had a happy birthday because I can't remember the last time I did ANYTHING for 12 hours. It means I am continuing to get stronger.

I left home for my mom's around 10:30 a.m. It takes a little over an hour to get to her house. I tried to time things so I would arrive for lunch because I knew she intended to feed me tons of my favorite things. It was a veritable salt-fest! I will be paying the price for it for at least a week if not 2!

We had a good visit. It was the first birthday I have spent with her since my heart problems started 5 years ago. I heard some words of wisdom a few weeks ago and I have decided to live by them. I lost my dad back in 2004. There had been some tension with my mom for the past few years but someone asked a question in a movie the other day and I decided to apply it to myself.

"Are you ready to lose your mom as well?" was the question.

The answer was, "NO!" She is getting older and I can see age beginning to take it's toll. Although I PRAY I look half as good as she does if I get to be her age!

We went to ARBY"S and got my favorite sandwich.

Then we went to KFC and got a bucket of chicken and sides. I haven't had Kentucky Fried Chicken for over 2 years because of the salt content! Then we picked up my favorite hotdogs at Mecca Drive-in.

On the way home we stopped at her favorite bakery and she had them make me a beautiful cake "Happy Birthday Pamala" with pink roses and smiley faces all around it. I wish I had a picture. We feasted all afternoon until around 7:00 pm.

I had to leave because I could feel the effects of the salt. She is a nurse and she over analyses all my symptoms. I didn't want her to see what it was doing to me. (it was affecting my breathing and my ankles were becoming the size of elephant legs!) So I went home.

I stopped to deliver some dinner to my uncles when a woman pulled up behind me. It was SIS! I haven't seen her in a couple of years and we hugged and caught up. I followed her to her new house. I haven't been because I thought I had to park by the road and walk up a very steep mountain to her house. I can't believe there has been a road to that house all these years and I NEVER knew it! In my defense I had never been to the house, it had belonged to Sis's aunt.

My mom gave me a beautiful card and I promised to come back and visit Sis. We'll spend the day beside the pool and watch movies like we always did.

It was a good day.

Friday, July 29, 2011

Just How Long Will an Unopened Package of Bacon Last Anyway?

This is the story of a package of bacon.

I bought it and forgot about it until well after the expiration date.

My usual custom in such cases was to fry it up for my dogs.

I kept forgetting to do it and the package of bacon was in my refrigerator for several months.

Then one day as I was debating whether to cook it for the dogs or throw it away because at some point cured meat must become rancid even to animals...

I noticed that the bacon looked as red and fresh in the package as the day I bought it.

Hmmm....I said to myself, "Self, how long will it take this bacon to go bad anyway? Even the manufacturer didn't expect the stuff to last this long."

So I put it back into the refrigerator.

I had it in the refrigerator for almost a year.

It still looked as fresh as a daisy.

I had no intention of throwing it away but I had to move.

It was accidentally misplaced in the move.

In an unrelated question: I have noticed in writing this that we keep meat in the REfrigerator - Just who friges meat the first time?

My First Car Wreck (that was my fault)

I was 17 years old. I was on my way home from a long day at school and then my shift at Burger Chef. It was around 11:30 at night and I was worn out. (I also had to get up for school the next day)

I was speeding as was my custom when I was that age. I came upon another car which had the nerve to actually be using the road in front of me. An intolerable situation which I intended to rectify at the earliest possible moment!

I was in front of the vet's office in Justice Addition when I saw an opening for myself to pass the car in front of me. The fact that it was a no passing zone is irrelevant to the story.

I whipped my car into the opposing lane and pressed the gas for all it was worth. I quickly speeded up to around 80 miles an hour and was just on the verge of getting past the car which was impeding my progress when I saw a set of oncoming headlights rounding the curve ahead of me! There was only one thing to do. I smashed on the brakes!

Now for those of you who don't know, here is a piece of advise that I learned the hard way that night. NEVER, NEVER, EVER, EVER PRESS THE BRAKES OF THE CAR WHEN YOU ARE GOING 80 MPH! No good will ever come of it. I immediately went into a tailspin! I had no control of my vehicle whatsoever! I don't know how many times doughnuts I did that night but I do know I barely missed a telephone pole, the car I had been passing and the oncoming vehicle. The last thing I remember before I ended up in the floorboard of the passenger side of the car was a cinderblock wall coming right at me!

My car came to an abrupt halt and as I sat curled up in the floorboard of the passenger side of the car taking stock of my body I realized I was not hurt. As I climbed out of my car I saw that I had run through a fence (chainlink) and over a bush. In fact I was parked on said bush and fence. I tried to start the car and it wouldn't start. (thankfully - who knows what damage I would have caused if the car had started and I had tried to move it) So I did the only thing I could do.

I got out of the car. As I did the car I was passing backed up to me to make sure I was alright. I thanked the man for stopping and assured him that I was in fact going to live. Then I had to gather my courage to knock on the door of the house whose yard I had just invaded and ask to use the phone to call my parents. (this was in pre cellphone days of course)

The people were very nice and only concerned for my safety. They let me use the phone at the midnight hour to call my parents and I tearfully broke down when my dad answered the phone and told him of my situation. He and my mom were with me in a matter of minutes. I made up some plausible story about being run off the road and I was delighted to discover that they were relieved to find that I was OK and the damage to the car and surrounding area was negligible at best. I was not even in trouble.

My dad told the people he would be there to collect the car in the morning. I had to pay to fix the man's fence and replace the bush out of my pocket but that was all. My dad was a car dealer so fixing the car was not a problem.

That was the night I understood the glory of being a car dealer's daughter. We never got in trouble for any vehicular mishaps we were involved in. Afterall it's just a car - not a person. An attitude that I have had toward cars my whole life - even now.

I always marvel when someone wrecks a car and everyone's first question is about the damage to the car - not the possible injuries suffered by the occupants of the car. I guess that's just the way I was raised to think about the situation.

It takes a lot of nerve for Clint Eastwood and Steven Speilberg to beg...

...for money at the beginning of the DVD's to renovate old movies.

How about they take some of the 100's of millions of dollars they have earned making movies and renovate the old movies themselves.

I am tired of watching that same old plea at the beginning of DVD's. I can't even skip it!

I agree that old movies should be preserved but give me a break - they can pay to do it ALL themselves!

I had my first Big Mac today....

I wasn't too awfully impressed.

I had a free coupon so I tried it. I ate half and gave half to a friend.

I also had a free coupon for a mango pineapple smoothie.

I wasn't too impressed with it either.

At least they were free. They would have to be for me to get another and I wouldn't go out of my way to do it then.

Thursday, July 28, 2011

I Finally Had a Good Swim Until...

The water was great the pool wasn't too crowded and the lifeguards were nice. Everything was fine until I heard a little girl call for help. I turned around and she was a couple of feet from me doing her level best to keep her head above water and grasp for the completely inadequate swim ring she had jumped into the pool with.

I zeroed in one her. All I had to do to help her was to extend an arm and let her grab it but I also knew that she needed to fight her way to the side (only a couple of feet away on each side of her) if at all possible. As I debated whether to help her or not I looked up to see the lifeguard doing the same thing I was doing. He was trying to let her make it on her own. Which she did - barely.

Once she made it to the side I looked at him and said, "I really thought she wasn't going to make it."

He agreed with me. He walked over to her and made sure she was alright. Then he asked her to swim the length of the pool. She floundered around like a small bird trapped in the water moving about an inch a minute. He looked at me and said, "what do you think?"

"Make her stay on the other side of the rope," I said as I shook my head no. "I've had to pull 3 of them out before and I don't want to add to the list."

"He agreed and proceeded to nicely ask the little girl to stay on the other of the rope. She proceeded to protest saying her mom let her swim in the deep end all the time. Finally after a couple of minutes of arguing the little girl went back to the shallow end of the pool. At this point I thought she was there alone. After a few minutes I saw she was joined by both her mom and her dad who were too busy cooing over their baby to intercede when she had run into difficulty in the pool. They also didn't intercede when their child was arguing with the lifeguard.

Every year I go to the pool and watch at least one child come close to drowning because their parents either aren't there or they aren't paying attention to their children. Most people don't realize how quickly a child can go under and usually when it happens there is no scream and no splash. They just go under and don't come back up.

Have ever watched a small child at play and watched them run themselves into complete exhaustion and keep on going. Many times this is what happens when children are swimming. The problem is that once they become too exhausted they just go under - too weak to even struggle. If you are not vigilant you will not even notice they are gone until it is too late.

I am so tired of watching the same scenario play out every year. I have saved 3 children myself and each time the parents were not present or weren't paying attention to their drowning child. I guess it will never change.

How Come?

when somebody hits a deer...nobody inquires as to the health of the poor deer?

You would think the poor deer hit the car on purpose the way people act sometimes. One time when our car was broken down over Christmas my father-in-law came to get us on Christmas Eve. He accidentally hit a deer on his way to get us. Fortunately he was not hurt and the damage to the car was minor.

When we got back to their house and he told my mother-in-law she was so furious that she locked herself in the bedroom and didn't come out for the rest of the evening. In their home the main Christmas holiday was on Christmas Eve. All the family was there, celebrating Christmas, but she refused to celebrate.

The car was fixed soon after Christmas.

A few weeks after that "SHE" hit a deer. The damage to the car was tremendous. She was fine. No one threw a tantrum on her either.

Can I pick 'em or what?

A few weeks ago I posted my top 8 picks for America's Got Talent in my review section. I also added my youtube pick. So far all of my picks but one has made it to the semi-finals. There is one act left to perform in next weeks (the last quarter final) show. He is the Kinetic King. I have no doubt he will make it as well.

Even Lys Agnes made it. I picked her to make it to the finals in the original show but I had my doubts after Tuesday nights performance. It seems most people in America are like me. Most of us don't appreciate opera but we do appreciate talent when we see it - and Lys Agnes is obviously talented at what she does.

The only act I picked that didn't make it was Echo the Parrot. It was obvious after the last show that we had seen all his tricks. So Bye, Bye, Birdie. He was my replacement pick after I kicked ELEW out of my top 8. It turns out ELEW was a professional muscian. Even though he was obviously brilliant at playing the piano, this show isn't about professionals. It is about helping Joe Shmo on the corner make it and do something better with their lives.

That is the beauty of the show.

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

My First Mammogram

Here is the story of my first mammogram. I went into the little room and the nurse had me to wipe off my underarms even though I told her that I wasn't wearing deodorant. My doctor had told me beforehand not to wear any. I put on the exam gown and waited until the tech came in.

She guided me over to the little window at the front of the machine. It is about 12x12inches square. There is a small shelf at the base of the window. As she was going around me she could see the perplexed look on my face and that I was hesitating. She asked me what was wrong. I very seriously looked over at her and said "There is no way that I can fit both of them on that little shelf."

Well, she busted out with one loud burst of laughter which she quickly cut off. She said "Honey we just do them one at a time." and turned away with a smile on her face. Now to make the picture even better I am not particularly well endowed. So I was standing there thinking " I'll never get them to squish together enough to fit on that shelf. How in the world do women with big ----s do this."

Then of course she proceeded to do the mammogram squishing and flattening them just like you have heard about. I don't think it was as painful as what some people would have you to believe.

I have told several of my friends this story when they tell me they are going to go for their first mammogram. Each of them came back afterward telling me how they pictured me in that room and they actually stood there smiling while they had their mammogram. It greatly eased their apprehension. Two of them even told me they had a good laugh with the tech about it.

So if it helps pass it on.

I posted this because I had another mammogram today - I was in and out of the building in less than 20 minutes.