Tuesday, April 8, 2014

You Have to Make Your Own Holidays - damnpamn's Blog - Blogster

You Have to Make Your Own Holidays - damnpamn's Blog - Blogster

That was my advice to both my niece and my nephew at separate
times in their lives.  They grew up having everything done for them
which is how it should be.  Now they live far away and have their own

 When I have asked each of them, at separate times, how
their holiday's were, they both replied, "it sucked." They are young
adults now and I told them at some point they had to start making their
own holidays or they would always suck.

I hate it that they feel
they have no family to spend the holidays with but their mom is dead and
they are still feeling their way along.  I wish I could help them but I
can't.  They both know they are welcome at my house anytime but I am
too far out of the way for them to visit  although thankfully that seems
to have changed this year as far as my nephew is concerned.

hope they soon find the holidays that I know they crave and have enjoyed
in the past.  I'm sure they will start their own traditions and maybe
my niece already has since she is a little older than he is.

My ex
husband also tried to tell me his holiday sucked after I left him.  I
asked him why he didn't plan one out?  I knew the answer.  With the
exception of a couple of years when I was hurt or sick, I had done all
the work for our holidays.  He also thought I would feel sorry for him
and invite him over.  I told him to go to a local church and eat one of
their dinners or go help in a homeless shelter - then he would remember
how blessed he was to have a job and work at something he loved.

year I will not be cooking.  I want to have a Thanksgiving where I am
rested and feeling good.  I don't want to be worn out from cooking food
that I am not supposed to have.  The kind of food we eat for our
holidays makes me feel bad for weeks after the holiday is over as well.

have already enjoyed some of the blessings of the season.  Lee Terrace
hosted a Thanksgiving Dinner last Satuday.  I did not attend because I
was tired and I was trying to avoid the salt and carbo loaded,
wonderful, delectable foods that I knew would be there.  But there was a
knock at my door and when I opened it I found that they had put a
dinner together and delivered it to me.  I was most appreciative because
I had been too tired to cook anyway.

I also received a food
basket from the Union Mission this year.  It is my 3rd. year to receive
one.  You go to pick it up at a church that reminds me of a mountain
lodge and they hold a religious service complete with music.  It is good
music of praise of the Lord without being that nasally stuff that I
grew up with.  It is a very nice service.

They also gave me a
basket from "Feed the Children".  I pointed out that I didn't have
children but they told me that didn't matter.  It is a case of them just
counting families served, I guess.  I figured I could just give the
stuff to some children I knew who could use it but I was surprised to
find that there was nothing in the basket that was for children other
than a cut out book and some cans of canned food.  Everything else is
stuff that it looks like was donated to "Feed the Children" from
corporate sponsors.  I honestly don't see anything in there for
children.  I plan to post a picture of the stuff in the box.  I am
grateful for it because I can use it but "Feed the Children" is supposed
to be feeding the most poverty stricken people in our state and I don't
see any evidence of that.  They also made the state of WV pay them a
million dollars before they would agree to even distribute anything here
in the first place.

Then Sunday a friend from Fruth gave me the
turkey that they gave to her for her Christmas bonus.  She said she
didn't want it.  I was surprised by that one to say the least.  It came
out of no where.  I spent a lot of years helping to feed people in this
building so I guess Karma is paying me back now that I am having

I will have 4 dinners delivered to me on Thanksgiving
Day from the Frankie Veltry Charity Dinner.  Frankie Veltry was a local
resident who fed homeless people out of his pocket every year and after
his death he made provisions for the dinner to continue.  They deliver
to the senior highrises.  I have been getting dinners for the past 3
years but I have been giving them to others that I knew didn't get
anything.  This year I will share if I need to but I plan on eating
those dinners myself.

I also have invitations to Eddie's mom's
house and my Great Aunt and Uncle's house.  But going out is hard on
me.  Socializing is hard.  Sitting and having an intelligent
conversation for an extended time is hard.  I'm giving myself the gift
of peace and relaxation and I am blessed to be able to do so.

is the "Feed the Children" food basket that I got.  I am pleased with
it but it is full of stuff for adults.  Of course the kids can eat the
food but they have no use for men's hair gel and assorted moisturizers
from Avon.  I guess it would be appropriate for a teenage girl.  But
"Feed the Children" is supposed to be feeding the poorest children in
the state.  I think they missed the mark.  There was also a relaxer for
black children.  I have already given it to someone I know that can use
it....as I will do with much of the stuff here.

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