Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Dead Men Walking

Pam rolled over to look into the cold, dead eyes of her husband. She jumped out of bed squealing. How can he be dead?

Mary went into Rick's room, apparently he wasn't going to respond to the alarm clock - again! The kid was going to be the death of her! He was dead.

"911, what's your emergency?" The emergency center was being flooded with calls. Men were dead everywhere. There was no way to respond to all the calls. All over the valley men weren't waking up. What the hell is going on?

The first report on the morning news went as follows: All over the country reports of men dying in their sleep are pouring in. The CDC has already begun an investigation into the phenomenon. There is one common thread in all the reports. Once the men go to sleep they just don't wake up again. Currently an advisory is being issued that ALL MEN SHOULD STAY AWAKE AS LONG AS IS HUMANLY POSSIBLE AND SLEEP ONLY UNDER SUPERVISION (although the supervision doesn't seem to help)

In a related story, we are sad to report the demise of our morning anchorman Chris Wells. His wife found him dead this morning. Police are investigating.

24 hours into the current emergency situation businesses and services are shutting down all over the country. All the handymen and maintenance workers are dying like flies. The women have little to no training to take over the routine operations of most heavy equipment. The world can't run with no one to keep it running.

What men that are left are doing their level best to stay awake. Apparently to sleep is a death sentence. The CDC is investigating but have not managed to learn anything in the first day of research. There is a definite timeline here. In 2 or three more days there will be no men because it just isn't humanly possible for them to stay awake.

Pregnant women giving birth to boys have their dreams turn to nightmares as each boy born is stillborn. Once they give birth, the boys cannot survive on their own and they just die. The little girls are fine. Steps are being taken to secure the nation's sperm banks. If all the men die then all the population will die. In extreme cases women are lining up to be inseminated by the men left who see a definite need to perpetuate the species.

One week later. All the men are gone. Women are struggling to run everything but they must be trained. There are rumors of men still living in certain medical experiments but by and large the whole male population of the world is gone. Research is on going but even if a cure is found for the new born male children, there is still going to be a generation of humanity with no men.

That sucks.

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